We all remember The Jordan Rules. If you need a refresher course, check Google or continue reading and you’ll probably figure it out. Back in the day, the Pistons reigned supreme in the East and the Jordan’s Bulls couldn’t beat them in the playoffs. Largely in part due to the defense implored by the Pistons in which they sent MJ to the floor time and time again. Eventually, Mike prevailed as the Pistons got older and slower. The rest is history.

Today, the rules are different and you can’t clothesline someone into the hardwood without being ejected and running the risk of being suspended. However, the the variables are all in place for this years Western Conference Finals to be the beginning of The Kobe Rules era. The world champion Spurs are guarding their title and Kobe’s Lakers, an upstart bunch, are trying to dethrone them. We all know what Kobe is bringing to the table, let’s look at why this cast of characters on the Spurs is comparable to that of the Bad Boys on the Pistons.

Fabricio Oberto
http://fantasysportsmatrix.com/videos/okur_head_slaps_oberto

When you think of Oberto you may not think of a dirty player, but I see him as a poor man’s Laimbeer. Oberto always seems to be in the middle of something albeit he’s usually on the receiving end of something. Nevertheless, he’s an instigator and is always running around looking to start something. Maybe it’s the long hair, maybe it’s the rubber band around his head that’s holding it in place. Whatever it is, this guy has a streak of dirtiness in him.

Manu Ginobli
http://fantasysportsmatrix.com/videos/raja_bell_hard_foul_on_manu_ginobi...

Ginobli is another one of those players that’s good at playing the role of the victim. Usually replays show that he’s initiating contact and then upon contact, he violently flails the other way and flops onto the floor. Flopping is an effective way to frustrate the opponent, get them in foul trouble, and possibly cause them to retaliate and risk ejection or suspension. It’s cheap, it’s dirty, and Ginobli is one of the best at it.

Robert Horry
http://fantasysportsmatrix.com/videos/nash_gets_a_hard_foul_robert_horry
http://fantasysportsmatrix.com/videos/david_west_gets_checked_robert_hor...

The nickname speaks for itself. Big Shot Rob. Too bad he hasn’t hit a big time bucket in a couple years now. But what he has done in consecutive years is hip check Steve Nash into the boards, instigating a riot on the court which resulted in Amare and Diaw being suspended. Then this year he went back to the hockey fundamentals and back checked David West into his already ailing lower back. Someone should really roll up under Horry’s knees and see how he likes being victimized by dirty play. Funny thing is I don’t thing Horry would care. He knows he’s a role player and one of his most important roles is getting under the opponents’ skin and seeing if he can get someone ejected. Even the Spurs fans know it, they were chanting “H-O-R-R-Y” as West laid on the floor motionless. Kobe better place a kevlar plate in his lower back because rest assured Horry is locked in on taking him out.

Bruce Bowen

Do a Google search for “bruce bowen dirty cheap” and see what you get. I feel like I don’t need to show any video or write anything about this guy. If you know basketball then you know this guy is one of the dirtiest players the league has ever seen. I can’t even count how many players he’s stuck his foot under during their jump shot, kicked their Achilles tendon, poked, slapped, gouged, and whatever else he’s known for. This guy must be a nightmare to play against.

The series starts tonight! I can’t wait to see what Popovich has in store for Kobe and how Zen Master Phil Jackson is going to counter the attack. Or will Jackson launch the offensive and force Popovich into defensive stance? We’ll have to wait until the whistle is blown to find out.