Dear Martin Rogers, Yahoo! Sports...

Hello Martin,
finally it has come to this, I can’t keep quiet anymore. I just want you to know that I hate reading your boring Yahoo! Exclusive Analysis pieceworks on our beautiful game. On your short introductory, it mentions you spent 7 years as a soccer writer – which is great – so it makes me wonder how you know so little about our beautiful game. Is it the toddler league that you wrote about? US collegiate women’s? It certainly isn’t the game that I religiously follow.

Your ‘masterpieces’ are nothing other than echoes of latest news with no other insight or thoughtful ideas which usually an “Exclusive Analysis” calls forth. Mind you, I never took classes in Journalism at Harlow College, but I did play our beautiful game for as long as I remember to be alive. My dislike of you is not unwarranted, I will proffer you with valid reasons why I feel Yahoo! Sports – Soccer will never be more than a minnow in the world wide web of soccer news reporting – mainly because of you. My intent is to dissect certain parts of your writing and expose you for the second-rate community-paper journalist that you are, rather than being an international correspondent Yahoo! Sports made you out to be.

In your latest article titled “Premier League’s new $ign of the times”, which by the way is a clever use of the dollar sign to foreshadow its content, you have very exclusively analyzed what other news reporting sites have exclusively analyzed. Not to insult, but did you know that in England they accept the pound as tender? I doubt very much that Man City took Abu Dhabi United’s dollar bills. Maybe you should have entitled it “Premier £eague’s new sign of the times”, which would make a whole lot more sense – if you only had some. Anyways, here’s a gold nugget:

“Signing Real Madrid’s Robinho, the most sought-after commodity in the marketplace, was about more than simply signing a talented player. It was a signal of intent.”

Martin my friend… Robinho was going to be bartered WITH boatloads of cash for Cristiano Ronaldo, THE most sought-after commodity in the marketplace. Where have you been all summer? For months, trade rumours have gone around about Cristiano, not Robinho. But in your statement that Robinho was the most sought-after player, which meant to say that clubs lined up around the corner for him, is just plain wrong. Robinho was never available or transfer-listed. He just enjoyed another winning campaign with Real and certainly he didn’t want to leave. And who could afford him? Since he felt disrespected by his own employers who were intent on using him as a trading tool to lure Cristiano in, he decided Real’s directors did not appreciate him for his talents so off he went. But I do agree with you that Man City signing Robinho was about intent, but then again when you have a trillion dollars available, isn’t buying the best that money can buy your only intent? Surely Man City wouldn’t have bought a guy like Clint Dempsey to fill the left-wing/forward role with that kinda cash to splash? But you get points for your acute awareness and undaunted observational skills.

Another beauty:
“Of course, money alone cannot guarantee success. Abramovich’s spending could not prevent United from winning the league title the past two years, and it couldn’t stop John Terry from slipping as he took the penalty kick that could have won the Champions League.”

Oh, winning the FA Cup and League Cup in 2007 isn’t considered success? How about runners up to UEFA Champions League? Is winning the Premier League considered the pinnacle of success for any clubteam? Anyways, lets examine some of Chelsea’s “big spending” in the past 2 seasons since winning the EPL in 2005:

1) Michael Ballack (signed as free agent in 2006)
2) Salomon Kalou (signed for undisclosed fee from Feyenoord in 2006)
3) Ashley Cole (traded W.Gallas + 5 million with Arsenal in 2006)
4) Khalid Boulahrouz (undisclosed from Hamburg in 2006, now in Sevilla)
5) Andrey Sheva (30.5 million pounds, haha)
6) Claudio Pizzarro (free agent in 2007 from Bayern, now on loan at Werder)
7) Tal Ben Haim (free agent in 2007, warming the bench)
8) Steve Sidwell (free agent 2007, Steve who?)
9) Florent Malouda (13.5 million pounds)
10) Nicolas Anelka (15 million pounds)

Lets compare this list to Real Madrid, who did win the last 2 seasons and spending even bigger.

1) Julio Baptista (12 million 2005)
2) Robinho (16 million 2005)
3) Sergio Ramos (18 million 2005)
4) Ruud v Nistelrooy (2006)
5) Fabio Cannavaro (2006)
6) Fernando Gago (2006)
7) Gabriel Heinze (12 million 2007)
8) Pepe (2007)
9) Wesley Sneijder (26 million 2007)
10) Arjen Robben (36 million 2007)

What’s the lesson here, Martin? The lesson is, to win there are two important things: 1) big bank and 2) what you spend it on. Chelsea did not spend nearly as much as they did when Abramovich opened up his cheque book in 2003/2004. Besides, they made the wrong purchases. So you saying that Abramovich’s spending over the last 2 years could not prevent Man Utd winning the EPL is staggeringly and unintentionally true, because Chelsea really didn’t spend very much.

Well, I’d love to continue on, and as I’m writing I’m getting thirstier for more, but I got an actual job to do, unlike you.

Sincerely,
Royal Orange